Sunday, August 28, 2011

Day 28

Menopause....ugh! I was late coming to this stage of life. Come to think of it, I've been late coming to every stage of life. It was on my forty-fifth birthday, standing in a dark hotel room in Boston at 1:00 in the morning and staring out the falling snow while I quietly wept that I suddenly realized that I wasn't a kid anymore. I'm sure that this is a realization that most people reach around twenty-nine or sooner but like I said, late bloomer. I guess that's why it was no surprise that I didn't start the menopausal stage of my life until I was nearly fifty-five, ten years past the age my mother and sisters began what most consider the final stage of your earthly journey. Although it has recently struck me that the next step is truly old age, I still haven't lost my youthful hope for the future. My sister once told me that once you hit menopause or at least fifty, you life is basically over. Gee, I sure hope not since I feel that I still have a lot of living to do. I've not only not given up on my dreams, I'm coming up with new ones every day. Most of my dreams have to do with either my work, my home or my beloved horses but I also dream of being fit and slim by this time next year...and being able to invest in an entirely new wardrobe, one that reflects the youth I know I'll feel. No, I don't intend to by any skinny jeans, mini skirts or midriff bearing tops but I would like clothes that make me feel good about myself again instead of the matronly cover ups I've been trying to hide behind for years. Going back to the subject of this post, I disagree with doctors who say that menopause itself has no effect on a woman's weight, ability to lose weight or how she feels over all. In fact, I disagree vehemently! True, part of the reason that we gain weight or find it difficult to lose weight at this age is that we usually aren't as physically active and although I know that thanks to computers, I personally live a more sedentary lifestyle than I did fifteen years ago, I also think that a lot of the problem is lack of energy. Whether it is because menopause seems to skew our sleep cycles or just the lack of hormones, I am so low energy on some days that I really don't want to get out of bed and then I sleep walk through my days just accomplishing what absolutely has to be done and not much else. Some days it takes effort just to walk a short distance much less even consider exercise of any kind. Still, in the back of my mind is that still flickering memory of how great I felt when I was fit and active. So, even though I feel like David facing Goliath, I'm determined to fight against the "symptoms" of menopause and do my best to regain the health and vitality that I had fifteen years ago. Maybe that seems like the impossible dream but remember who was the victor in that David against the giant battle. I think I can do this.....of course then there are those unusual cravings that occur whenever the hormones go on a rampage but one battle at a time. After all, I'm only human ;-)

Oh, and as if I don't have enough to do....or enough that I'm not getting done,lol.....with my art, the magazine, the house, and this blog, I've decided to start a new blog which highlights the work and shops of other artists (and occasionally my own new work--it is my blog! :-) from Etsy.com and around the web. It's called Ye Olde Curiosity Shoppe and I post seven or eight new shops/pieces each Saturday. If you have the time, check it out; it's lots of fun and has a broad range of prices and styles.

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